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KMID : 0385320050160020173
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Journal of Korean Psychoanalytic Society
2005 Volume.16 No. 2 p.173 ~ p.181
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Sextet on a Bed：A Psychoanalytic Note on Love Relations
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Lee Byung-Wook
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Abstract
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This title is a kind of metaphor because there is no bed for six persons. Freud mentioned that the most important thing in our lives is the harmony of love and work. I consider love and hate as the most basic elements driving our lives, but integration of the two is necessary to lead a mature life. Marital life is the initation ceremony and litmus paper for a mature adult life. Dynamic understanding of the love relationship in marriage give us important clues on the wisdom of life. As in an analytic situation, all couples interact with each other’s id, ego, and superego. Symbolically, there are six people in the one bed because they respond to each other’s selves, maternal imagos, and paternal imagos at the same time. These events arise unconsciously from their inner worlds, and this is a key point for many marital or sexual problems, excepting organic diseases. Mature loving relationships need to integrate love and hate originating from early childhood experiences. A successful marriage is the seed of a successful life, and it is common sense that good love relations yield good workability. On the other hand, immature loving relationships disclose unfinished homework and delay arising from unhappy early mother-infant relationships. In the manner of musical harmony. mature love is like a harmonious sextet in one bed, and immature love like a disharmonious sextet. I conclude that deep dynamic understanding of the intra-psychic and inter-psychic love-hate relations in every couple is the short-cut to a successful life.
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KEYWORD
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Love, Marriage, Sextet, Internal object
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